"On the Surface"

The sun hit my face as we drove around the city. I was here so often but today felt different. I smiled looking out of the window getting lost in the music. It wasn't until we stopped moving I realized I wasn't alone. I looked over and saw him. My best friend from birth. Sometimes I wonder how he's still here. I was surprised I didn't bother him. Looking into his eyes I sheepishly looked away. I'd been looking for too long. Looking down at my hands fidgeting I felt his hand on my chin. Even more embarrassed I kept looking down but he pulled my face up. Before I knew it his lips were on mine. Confused I didn't kiss back, he's my best friend, what was he doing? Lost in the moment I separated my lips and kissed him back. Starling him he pulled away. It was his turn to look away sheepishly, but that kiss was too good for it to be so short. Taking his face in my arms I pushed my lips onto his and kissed him fiercely. I had no idea what we were doing or how long it was going to last but I didn't think of that, I just kissed him. I wasn't expecting him to kiss back but he did. He slipped his tongue into my mouth. Holy shit we were going to regret this. Unable to breathe we separated. We sat for a moment in silence, what the hell just happened. 

“What does-” i began to ask 

“don't ruin the moment” he said while turning the radio up and pulling out of the park.

We had planned to meet with a few friends at the nearest mall and we were already running late due to that kiss. Getting lost in the music once more I smiled, I was right. Today was going to be beyond perfect. I had no clue what this kiss meant to either one of us but I knew I'd have time to ask him later. I agreed with him, let's not ruin the moment. Pulling into the mall parking lot I spotted john. smiling i unbuckled my seatbelt, it's been months since i've seen him and i missed him. Running to John he pulled me into a hug wrapping his arms around my waist and lifting me up. If one person gave comforting hugs it was him. Letting go of all my worries and thoughts I smelled the scent I haven't smelt in forever. Today I wouldn't worry, I'd leave that to tomorrow. As my feet touched the ground I looked around looking for brianna. spotting her with michael i looked at him. If he glared any harder his eyes would fall off. I knew he didn't have the best start with John but they were cool now. Confused, I walked up to him. 

“Whats wrong with you” 

“SAMANTHA” brianna yelled 

“BRIANNA” i yelled back in excitement

“Omg i missed you” 

“Trust me I missed you more” pulling her into a hug I closed my eyes. I was blessed to be surrounded by these people. 

“How was vacation” i asked forcing myself out of my thoughts 

“It was amazing, who knew i needed that” 

“I did,” I said laughing. 

Letting go of her i noticed michael watching me 

“What” i said defensively 

“He shouldn't have hugged you that way” 

“What do you mean” 

“You let him carry you” 

“He does that every time and you never have an issue with it” 

“I don't want anyone touching what's mine” he said under his breath 

Making out what he just said I blushed, he called me his. It didn't take long for me to snap out of my thoughts. Michael is my best friend. What the hell was happening here. About to ask him, I remember what he said earlier… Let's not ruin the moment. I was here with everyone that I loved, I was going to enjoy it. 

~the next day~ 

After partying all night we went to the closest place near the bar and it was my house. Waking up with a massive headache and smelling like alcohol, I tried remembering what happened yesterday. Was it a dream or did I actually kiss michael? waking up I saw him on the floor. Why was Michael sleeping in my room if there was enough room for everyone to get their own room? Not wanting to wake him i stepped over him 

“Good morning” he said in a sleepy voice 

“Morning” i said walking into the bathroom 

Could I have actually kissed michael? I will ask him later today. I finished washing up and went down to the kitchen to make coffee. If I woke up with this headache they all would too. Upon walking into the kitchen i saw john and brianna making out on the couch 

“You know i have bedrooms right” i asked with a smile on my face 

“Sorry, we weren't planning on anyone finding out yet” replied brianna 

“Babe it's about time they found out” john said in between kissing briannas neck

“john get your horny ass up and make coffee i'm tired” i said while snuggling on the couch next to them 

“Thanks for ruining the moment” he said with a smirk on his face 

“So, tell me everything” i whispered to brianna 

“Long story, but let's say vacation” she replied blushing 

“I was suspecting it all long but i didn't think it would happen” 

“It did” she said blushing even more

Laughing i pulled her up “ lets go get dressed im sick of pjs already” 

She held my hand and followed me out 

“hey babe bring the coffee up when it's done” brianna yelled from the stairs 

Walking into my room I told her to help herself to my closet. I wanted to shower first. grabbing a shower I tried not thinking much of what happened yesterday. I was sure that I kissed michael. 

~

After getting ready we went downstairs to grab the coffee that never came up. Walking down I noticed michaels eyes on me. Slightly blushing, I looked away and ran toward that coffee. Not wanting to talk to anyone i slipped through the back door and stood outside, enjoying the birds singing i heard the door open and looked back 

“Hey” michael said 

“Hey” i replied back 

“Whats wrong” he asked 

“Nothing just thinking” 

“About?” 

“Yesterday” 

“Oh you mean this” as he leaned down kissing me again 

Not wanting to get lost in the moment i pulled away 

“Yes, what does this mean” i asked looking at the floor 

He wrapped his arms around my bare waist pulling me in 

“I'm in love with you” he breathed

Unable to respond back my knees felt weak

“I-” 

“I've always been, and I wasn't sure how much longer I could go without kissing your lips or calling you mine. It drove me crazy watching other people touch you. 

“michael I-” 

“Shh” he said pulling me into another kiss

This time I kissed back, wrapping my arms around his neck. Pulling away for air i heard myself say “me too” 

“Me too what, i want to hear you say it” 

“I've been in love with you too” 

Smiling i stepped away “so what happens now” i asked 

“Well the other 2 are full out making out im scared to go inside” 

Laughing i opened the door “their gonna hate me for ruining the moment again but i want to go to the beach” 

~ A Few Years Later ~

Pulling out to reality I realized it was my turn to speak, getting up with tears in my eyes. I looked at the crowd around me. 

“We are here today because we lost an angel. While I knew him and loved him since I could remember, we didn't get to spend a lot of time as lovers. I lost my best friend, my fiance, and the love of my life. Michael meant the world to me and as I live the rest of my life without him I will never forget him.” 

Unable to keep myself together I fell to the floor sobbing. He was really gone. I told him not to come visit me away for college. I told him that I was coming home in 2 weeks. Instead he got in his car and started driving to see me. It was then that he got into a car accident and breathed his last on the phone with me. I heard him in pain, I heard him die but I wasn't with him. He left the world alone. I was sure that I wouldn't recover from this, I couldn't there was no way. Everything about our life together was perfect and it ended in tragedy. 

~ 

The ceremony ended and I dreaded this moment the most. His wish was to have his ashes spread in the ocean. Specifically right by the rocks where he first asked me out. He wanted me to have a nice view when I came to visit him. Even in death he thought of me. Drying my tears I grabbed the urn of his ashes. Unable to walk up the rocks alone, Brianna and John held me on each side guiding me. Was I ever going to be able to walk on my own again? Opening the urn i whispered “I love you, i always will and i always have” 

Watching his ashes fall on the surface I smiled. I hoped he was at peace. I hope he lived life to his fullest. I knew he would want me to move on but for now it was just him and the beach.